Happy New Year 2020

I am free in the new year

Wow, Happy new year! Happy 2020!

A new year is here with us and behold we are hopeful and looking forward to new beginnings. Last year I took a break and I went through so much that just like a wind it flew without a single post for me. It was not easy I confess but God walked with me and eventually I came out stronger and wiser.

When I seat to reflect on the miracles of last year I recall when my mom was hospitalized in the month of August. It had been several months before I had seen her and she would call me requesting to visit her and take care of her. On this particular morning she called and told me that she was unable to cook for herself and that she would like me to go and live with her in the upcountry until she would be strong again.

It was unbelievable because her voice spoke with authority and you could not imagine any kind of weakness in her. I made up to travel and on seeing her at arrival I was broken and shuttered. As I saw her across the road I could not believe that was my mother as she had lost too much weight, looking malnourished and feeble. She wore a black hat that hid her face in it and her legs pencil thin as she sat on a rock waiting for me. Still in belief I called her just to confirm that whoever I was seeing was indeed my mother.

I took out my phone and sent a message to my best friend and saying that mama was terrible. I held my tears and walked towards her and greeted her. Friends, mum was dying! Fast forward, we got home and I prepared some food for us. Mum ate as if she had never eaten before! She told me that it was now FOURTY DAYS of fasting and that she had been on a diet of yogurt and water. Can you even believe it! Fasting and underweight in the same line! Goodness. That night she said she had found peace and she could not hide her joy in seeing me. Let me tell those are not words you hear from a sick person because you start to think that maybe they want to leave us for good.

The next two days we spent trying to put her back on diet until the third day I realized that she was also mentally ill. Mum kept speaking weird things. She vomit and say that she was vomiting people who wanted to kill her.During the day alone she threw up almost 20 times and this went on until midnight. The next day she refused eating completely. Then something happened in the middle of the night she started screaming that people were coming to kill us and had hallucinations. Friends that was it. It was over! I seeked helped from a neighbor who is also a pastor and we took her to the hospital.

We took her using a car and she kept saying that the pilot was doing a good job and that she loved the plane. Upon arrival, there was so much to be done and they had to sedate her for doctors to be able to treat her. I was almost 2 am. We had to leave and come back the next day.

Ever been shocked and chilled? That was me when I went back to visit mum. I did not find her in the bed that I had left her the previous night. I panicked asking God why He took her before I was back to watch her last words. Luckily before I dropped into whaling, a nurse came and told me that they had shifted her because she became violent at night and had to take her away from other patients in the ward. I found her bound on her hands and legs first asleep. That was enough for that day.

So much happened during the period she was in hospital. One day she called me a witch wanting to kill her. Another day she said we had poisoned her food, that we were giving her drugs to kill her and on another one she even said that the hospital clothes we were dressing her were mortuary clothes that we had planned to use for burying her. Lest I forget, on another incidence she faked death, and while I held her, she fell on the floor still!

It is too much I cannot draft all of them, but let me confess that we serve a living God. A God who never sleeps nor forsakes His people. She got healed and recovered her mental state. I do not like to tell her of those stories nor show her those photos because they crash her. But she is now reborn and more motivated with life than before.

I am standing strong with the word of God from

Revelation 21:5

He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.”

To me this is truly a new year. A new beginning for my relationship with mama. A newness in appreciating every little gift that we have been granted. Thanking God for good health. He has set me free and He has set us free. I would like to encourage you too reading this, do not give, no matter what point that you may have reached. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, it may not be visible now, but believe me it is there waiting for you with joy. Do not forget to be joyful, even when life has left you shattered, rejoice always.

My regards.

By Medza Mtana

Blogger deep into communications, loves sooking and smiles a lot.

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